First Impressions – turn fear into courage

Peter Murphy

The top business people all say the same thing – first impressions
count. Sounds easy, and it is easy for those few who can start a
conversation with just about anyone but how many people do you know
who are like that?

On the other hand when you’re shy it’s easy to avoid other people, shyness
automatically comes with a PhD in how to creatively avoid
people, especially strangers! However this tendency can prove
detrimental to your business especially when you consider that your ultimate
success can depend on approaching people and making a great
first impression.

There is a better way; it is possible to use your mind in a simple
yet powerful way that will make it easy for you to make a fantastic
first impression. It involves applying peak performance principles
in a special way.

Here’s what I do when I´m at a conference and I spot someone I
know that I ought to say Hello to although my initial tendency is
to just avoid them and hope that they don’t see me.

First of all, feel yourself standing tall, just pretend that you
feel dynamic, powerful and enthusiastic and take on that posture.
Breathe deeply, chest out, and smile so wide that you can feel
the stretch in your cheeks. Even if you make believe you will still
tend to come across far better with whoever you approach.

Then, as you approach him or her, hear yourself saying HI or HELLO
inside your head. The key is to make the sound very, very loud
inside your head, really exaggerate it to impress your mind with
your intention.

Finally, visualize that person smiling as they recognize you and
make sure to go overboard with the imagined picture in your mind
as well. Make the picture twice as big as life size, make it 3D,
in rich color and very bright and up close in your mind’s eye.

All this takes just a few seconds when you get good at it, at
first you may find it tricky, practice it with people you see about
town and you’ll soon find yourself greeting more people.

I also use this technique when I’m waiting in line at the bank, in
a store etc. That way you get an opportunity to be friendlier with
whoever is serving you and with the other people waiting in line.

In a short time you will find it easier and easier to start
conversations with people you would not have dared to approach in
the past. Do this day after day and the cumulative effect on your business
will be staggering.

Keys to success:

1 Practice this skill daily until it becomes second nature to you.

2 Teach your staff how to approach people as well, by teaching
this skill you will become even better yourself.

3 Remind yourself of the negative implications of not making a great first
impression and the long-term effect on your business.

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert and published author.
Subscribe FREE to his upbeat newsletter and get a FREE e-book,
Abolish Shyness – Steps to Success, which reveals secret strategies
for supercharging your communication skills.
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BUILD YOUR SELF ESTEEM, A STARTER GUIDE TO SELF IMPROVEMENT

So how do you stay calm, composed and maintain self esteem in a tough environment? Here are some tips you may to consider as a starter guide to self improvement.



Imagine yourself as a Dart Board. Everything and everyone else around you may become Dart Pins, at one point or another. These dart pins will destroy your self esteem and pull you down in ways you won't even remember. Don't let them destroy you, or get the best of you. So which dart pins should you avoid?



Dart Pin #1 : Negative Work Environment

Beware of dog eat dog theory where everyone else is fighting just to get ahead. This is where non-appreciative people usually thrive. No one will appreciate your contributions even if you miss lunch and dinner, and stay up late. Most of the time you get to work too much without getting help from people concerned. Stay out of this, it will ruin your self esteem. Competition is at stake anywhere. Be healthy enough to compete, but in a healthy competition that is.



Dart Pin #2: Other People's Behavior

Bulldozers, brown noser's, gossip mongers, whiners, back stabbers, snipers, people walking wounded, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders, patronizers, sluffers all these kinds of people will pose bad vibes for your self esteem, as well as to your self improvement scheme.



Dart Pin #3: Changing Environment

You can't be a green bug on a brown field. Changes challenge our paradigms. It tests our flexibility, adaptability and alters the way we think. Changes will make life difficult for awhile, it may cause stress but it will help us find ways to improve our selves. Change will be there forever, we must be susceptible to it.



Dart Pin #4: Past Experience

It is okay to cry and say ouch! when we experience pain. But don't let pain transform itself into fear. It might grab you by the tail and swing you around. Treat each failure and mistake as a lesson.



Dart Pin #5: Negative World View

Look at what your are looking at. Don't wrap yourself up with all the negativities of the world. In building self esteem, we must learn how to make the best out of worst situations.



Dart Pin #6: Determination Theory

The way you are and your behavioral traits is said to be a mixed end product of your inherited traits (genetics), your upbringing (psychic), and your environmental surroundings such as your spouse, the company, the economy or your circle of friends. You have your own identity. If your father is a failure, it does not mean you have to be a failure too. Learn from other people's experience, so you'll never have to encounter the same mistakes.



Sometimes, you may want to wonder if some people are born leaders or positive thinkers. NO. Being positive, and staying positive is a choice. Building self esteem and drawing lines for self improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent. God wouldn't come down from heaven and tell you that, you may now have the permission to build self esteem and improve your self.



In life, its hard to stay tough specially when things and people around you keep pulling you down. When we get to the battle field, we should choose the right luggage to bring and armors to use, and pick those that are bullet proof. Life ís options give us arrays of more options. Along the battle, we will get hit and bruised. And wearing a bullet proof armor ideally means self change. The kind of change which comes from within. Voluntarily. Armor or Self Change changes 3 things: our attitude, our behavior and our way of thinking.



Building self esteem will eventually lead to self improvement if we start to become responsible for who we are, what we have and what we do. Its like a flame that should gradually spread like a brush fire from inside and out. When we develop self esteem, we take control of our mission, values and discipline. Self esteem brings about self improvement, true assessment, and determination. So how do you start putting up the building blocks of self esteem? Be positive. Be contented and happy. Be appreciative. Never miss an opportunity to compliment. A positive way of living will help you build self esteem, your starter guide to self improvement.

TAKING THE FEAR OUT OF THE HYPNOTIC TRANCE

by Christine Hunter

Mention the word “Hypnosis” to someone and the chances are you will get one of three very different reactions: intense curiosity, nervousness, or disdainful skepticism. But the truth is hypnosis is widely used today not just in medicine but also by top sports performers, business experts, and those in the media to boost their performance and mental focus. Despite this, many members of the public still view hypnosis with fear and suspicion especially when the hypnotist talks about putting the client into a “Hypnotic Trance”

The first point to make is that, despite the origin of its name, hypnosis does not involve sleep. When a person is in a hypnotic trance, the body may be in a very relaxed state, but the mind is alert and highly focused. It is also a very natural state. All of us experience a trancelike state many times in our daily lives. Those of us who drive cars are very familiar with the phenomenon of driving along a well known route and arriving at our destination-and then being aware that we can’t remember the journey at all. It is as if we were on autopilot for the journey, and in a sense we were. We were in what we refer to as a kind of trance.

The same can occur when we are engrossed in a movie, reading a book, listening to music, or gazing into the eyes of someone we love. Time seems to stand still and we are oblivious of the outside world, our attention completely focused on what we are doing at that moment. That to can be described as a trance. Many people also consider a trance to be the state achieved in mediation or when we are daydreaming.

The key difference between those described above and the hypnotic trance is that during a hypnotic trance there is another person – the hypnotist – who is guiding us into the state.

During a trance, the aim of the hypnotist is to talk directly to the patient’s unconscious mind. The conscious mind can act as a barrier to this communication, and so it is either distracted or encouraged to be still.

Once the hypnotist has ensured that the client is in the desired hypnotic trance the hypnotist then make suggestions to the subject. These suggestions are the triggers that aim to change people’s habits, boost their confidence, or help them come to terms with their past. Such suggestions are made not to our conscious mind, but to our unconscious mind, the part of the mind that controls so much of our lives.

Ask many people how they think the hypnotic trance is achieved and they will describe the hypnotist slowly swinging a watch on a chain in front of a patients eyes or the hypnotist stares into a person’s eye’s to put him or her into the trance. While these were once a common method of inducing trance, hypnotists now often rely just on words and guided imagery.

Once the healing suggestions have been made an the purpose of the trance has been accomplished, the final task of the hypnotist is to bring the subject out of the hypnotic state and back into ordinary consciousness.

A common technique is for the hypnotist to count from one to five giving positive suggestions along the way. As he or she counts up from one to five, the client will feel as if he or she is coming out of trance into waking consciousness. The aim is to make the transition as smooth as possible.

Though hypnosis is not the same as sleep. Many people report feeling refreshed and enjoying a general sense of well-being after coming out of a hypnotic trance. Others claim that they sleep better after a session of hypnosis.

ISSUES HYPNOSIS CAN HELP WITH

• Stop Smoking
• Children’s Issues
• Weight Loss
• Migraine Headaches
• Pre-Surgical Hypnosis
• Procrastination
• Manage Stress
• Sports and Job Performance
• IBS
• ADD/ADHA
• Relationships
• Restful Sleep
• Removing Fears and Phobias
• Sexual Abuse Issues
• AND SO MUCH MORE…

Contact us today for a free consultation.

Christine Hunter Master Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist
Anew Serenity Hypnosis Center
Portland, Oregon
(503)975-7714

Visit us on the web at: www.anewserenity.com
or email us at christine@anewserenity.com

Christine Hunter is a Master Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist who owns an operates Anew Serenity Hypnosis Center in Portland, Oregon. Christine specializes in helping people who are survivors of sexual abuse. She is a member in good standing with the National Guild and the Oregon Hypnotherapy Association as well as other national and international organizations.

christine@anewserenity.com

Overcoming The Fear Of Money

by Andrew Lawrence

Many people, it seems, have a fear of money. Does the thought of having a lot of money make you uncomfortable? Cause you anxiety? If so, it may be that you are buying into the myths about money. Myths that are simply untrue. In fact, many of the most common statements about money are often misquoted, wrong, or were made by people who did not understand money ... or had none.

Let's look at a few of the myths about money ...

"Money is the root of all evil"

Everybody has heard this one. Unfortunately, it's one of the most famous misquotes of all time. The original quote comes from the New Testament and the correct quote is "the LOVE of money is the root of all evil". The love of money is an obsession and thus the true quote warns of the potential corruption that can derive from a love of, or obsession with, money (or any unhealthy preoccupation).. The fact is that money itself is neither good nor evil. It is neutral. Money can be used for good or it can be used for bad. How it is used is a choice, and the choice of how to use money is in the hands of he (or she) who controls it.

"Money is Power" (and Power corrupts)

Money itself has no real power. For instance, if you were legally given 10 million after-tax dollars in cash, put it in a safe deposit box, never touched it and never told anyone you had it you would have no more power than you do right now. The power of money comes from the use (or misuse) of it or the perceived benefit or threat by others. The money itself does not generate any power; it has to be converted into power. And whether or not you wish to convert money into power is a choice. And if one decides to convert money into power that power may be used for good or for evil, depending on the character of the person with the money.

"Money will change your life"

Let's hope so! Used wisely, money can greatly ease many of life's burdens and greatly enhance one's life. Or, if you have a weak character, choose to live in fear and worry, you can let money make you miserable. It's not the money, it's YOU. The important thing to realize is that you get to control the money, it doesn't get to control you. Want proof? Here's how much actual control you have over your money - in the extreme, you can always give all the money away - and be rid of it. Just like that. You can give it all to charity, you can throw it out the window, you can walk down the street and hand it out. You can burn it all. It's yours and you can do whatever you want with it, including give it away. Gone. You can make it all disappear if you choose to do so. That may be a stupid choice but that choice is always yours. That's the ultimate power you have over your money and it rests in your hands. Money doesn't ruin or change your life or change you or take control over your life. Unless you let it. And since you have the ultimate power to get rid of it why would you let it ruin your life?

"Money can't buy you happiness"

This is true - if you are not happy to begin with. However, if you reasonably well-grounded, have a good value system and a little control over yourself money won’t hurt you either. Contrary to popular wisdom, money and happiness are not mutually exclusive. In fact, money can greatly enhance the security, independence and well being of your life, your family's life and the lives of people you care about. Money can't buy you happiness but happiness can't buy you money!

To sum it up, the fear of money is often based on misconceptions. The truth is that money itself is simply an inanimate thing, doesn't know or care who does what with it, has no moral or ethical value and is a necessary commodity to have in the civilized world. Money, in the hands of whoever has it, has the capacity for great good or great evil, depending on who is doing the spending. It is not money that should be judged but the character and actions of the person (or entity) who uses it.

Money is nothing to fear.

Andrew Lawrence is a former Wall St money market professional who studied and understands money. He has managed money in excess of 500 million dollars. He now spends his time helping individuals find their true purpose in life, through his website at http://lifemastery.tripod.com

Andrew Lawrence is a former Wall St money market professional who studied and understands money. He has managed money in excess of 500 million dollars. He now spends his time helping individuals find their true purpose in life, through his website at http://lifemastery.tripod.com

Sales Therapy 101 Breaking Your Fear of Cold Calling

by Ari Galper

Almost every day, visitors to my Unlock The Game™ website click on my live instant-messenger chat button, which invites them to "Ask Ari a selling question."

And do you know what their most common question is?

Yes, you guessed it: "Is there any way I can break through or overcome my fear of cold calling?"

Most of us have at least some resistance to cold calling, and some people I talk with have such a paralyzing visceral and emotional fear of cold calling that they can't even consider doing it.

In some ways, the fear of cold calling is practically an epidemic -- but not the kind of epidemic that gets publicized on TV or in newspapers. It's a silent and personal one, a psychological struggle that happens in our own hearts and minds.

The fear of cold calling is a painful, daily struggle for many entrepreneurs and salespeople who have been trained in traditional selling techniques.

Traditional sales trainers answer questions about cold calling this way:

"All you have to do is make more phone calls."

"All you have to do is think more positive thoughts."

"Just learn to accept rejection as a normal part of selling."

In other words, "It's your fault that you aren't succeeding in sales."

This is like telling someone who's terrified of jumping off a diving board, "Don't be a wimp! Just jump!"

In my experience, very few people are able to overcome their fears that way, because the underlying message is that, if you force yourself to do something uncomfortable, "just doing it" will magically solve the problem.

But this is a response that shows no understanding at all of the psychological barriers that underlie the fear of cold calling. So, how do you overcome your fear of cold calling?

In my opinion, the solution actually is simple, and is based on understanding three simple concepts:

1. It's Not Your Fault

We can't help thinking there's something wrong with us if other people keep telling us that something shouldn't be a problem, but our own inner feelings tell us that we aren't comfortable doing it.

There's a sort of "old boys' club" sales-conditioning mentality prevalent in English-speaking countries, including the US, Canada, the UK, Australia, and New Zealand, that says, "I had to suffer to succeed in sales success, so you need to, too!"

This thinking comes from traditional sales programs that continue to be the accepted approach to selling.

What you need to understand, though, is that you may fear cold calling because you have probably been exposed only to traditional selling approaches, which triggers rejection.

These approaches teach us to make cold calls this way: introduce yourself, explain what you do, suggest a benefit to the potential client...and then close your eyes and pray that they won't reply with "Sorry, not interested" or "Sorry, I'm busy."

If you're still using this traditional approach, you probably hear responses like these the moment you stop talking.

They're rejections, and what they do us make you feel rejected -- and that's reason enough to make you dislike, fear, and avoid cold calling.

How can cold calling be a positive experience if rejection is the most common response you get?

2. Are Your Self-Perceptions Passive or Aggressive?

Whenever I chat with people about the fear of cold calling, they almost always tell me that they're afraid to make cold calls because they don't want to be perceived as "aggressive."

This is another part of the internal battle -- they beat themselves up for being too passive and lacking the confidence to make the next call, but they don't want to call for fear of being seen as aggressive.

Here's the good news: there is a middle ground between "aggressive" and passive."

It's a place where you can be who you are while still being extremely effective with cold calling, without ever experiencing rejection again.

Unlock The Game™ shows you how you can be incredibly effective in cold calling without triggering rejection from potential clients. Imagine the possibilities (and the income potential).

3. Learn to Let Your Language Match Your Thinking

If you can center yourself into a place where you can let go of feeling that you have to go on using traditional cold calling "scripts" and behaviors, you'll find yourself spontaneously using language that you would use in a natural conversation.

Using natural words and phrases -- speaking exactly the way you would with someone you know, can transform cold calling into a refreshing and productive experience.

And, as you let go of the old-school cold calling model, in which your product or service is your only way of generating a phone conversation with a prospect, you'll make the most crucial transition of all: you'll begin thinking of approaching potential prospects not from your perspective, but from theirs.

What do I mean by that?

Imagine what it would be like if you could hear your prospect's thoughts about the problems they are having -- and that your solution can solve.

Even more importantly, suppose you could also make note of the words and phrases they're using as they think about their problems, and that you could take that language and embed it in your cold calling approach.

"Yes, but how would I do that?" you might ask.

It's simple. Just ask your current clients what three core problems your product or service has solved for them.

When you change your thinking, you can't help changing the language that you use, which lets you connect in a whole new positive way with the other person you are calling.

If you can let go of your old-school belief system and open up to the possibility that there is a more natural, comfortable way to cold call -- one that doesn't trigger rejection -- you'll be surprised by how easily you'll break through and overcome your fear of cold calling.

With a Masters Degree in Instructional Design and over a decade of experience creating breakthrough sales strategies for global companies such as UPS and QUALCOMM, Ari Galper discovered the missing link that people who sell have been seeking for years.

His profound discovery of shifting one's mindset to a place of complete integrity, based on new words and phrases grounded in sincerity, has earned him distinction as the world's leading authority on how to build trust in the world of selling.

Leading companies such as Gateway, Clear Channel Communications, Brother International and Fidelity National Mortgage have called on Ari to keep them on the leading edge of sales performance. Visit http://www.unlockthegame.com to get his free sales training lessons.

The Fear of Feeling

by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

We desire to find the path to peace, joy and freedom. We strive to feel lovable, worthy and secure. We know that if we do our inner work and open to our connection with Spirit, we will feel all of that. Yet we don't. We put it off for days or weeks. We stay stuck in our misery or numbness. Why? What are we so afraid of if we open to learning about loving?

I have searched for many years for the answer to this question. Over and over I would find myself out of grace and joy and into anxiety and stress. Each time it was because I failed to take care of myself in some way.

The problem is that all feelings are in the same box. Pain is in the same box as joy. We cannot be putting a lid on pain without putting a lid on joy as well.

What is the pain we are striving so hard to avoid feeling? Most people feel a lot of pain. We feel anxious, frightened, depressed, hurt. Since we are often in pain, it doesn't seem to make sense that we are, at the same time as we are feeling all this pain, also avoiding pain. Yet that is exactly what we are doing.

As unhappy as we may be feeling, we are avoiding pain that we believe is even greater than the pain we are feeling.

I have discovered that there are three feelings which most people want to avoid at all cost: aloneness, loneliness and helplessness.

Aloneness is what we feel inside when we are disconnected from a spiritual source of love. Loneliness is what we feel when we cannot connect with another, either because our heart is closed, their heart is closed, or both of our hearts are closed. Helplessness is what we would feel if, when we want to connect with another and his or her heart is closed, we accept that there is nothing we can do to make them open their heart. Helplessness is what we feel when we accept our lack of control over others.

When we were babies and small children, we couldn't allow ourselves to feel these feelings. We could not have handled them and may have died of despair. So we learned many protections to avoid feeling these feelings.

The problem is that we still think we will die if we feel these feelings, so we are still avoiding them. We avoid connecting with God for fear God will not be there and we will feel alone. We get angry, withdraw, eat, drink, take drugs, watch TV, get busy, overwork and so on to avoid feeling the pain of our loneliness and helplessness.

Yet loneliness in our society is unavoidable. There are so many people who spend their lives with their hearts closed to avoid their pain that it is impossible not to be around people whose hearts are closed some of the time. If we choose to avoid feeling our loneliness and helplessness, then we too will close our heart. However, when we close our heart we close down the joy too. Then we are stuck with the anxiety, fear, depression and hurt that is endemic in our society.

You will not die if you open to feeling your loneliness and helplessness. It is even quite tolerable if you hold your lonely Inner Child (your feeling self) while bringing through love from Spirit, for then you are not alone in your loneliness. The willingness to feel the pain of loneliness and helplessness opens the door to joy, peace, and freedom. The more you open to spiritual help in your loneliness, the more you are able to embrace the privilege of this sacred journey of evolving your soul. There is great joy in the journey, even when there is loneliness!

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?" and “Healing Your Aloneness.” She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone Sessions Available.

"A Piece of Blarney Stone"

10 ways to empower your communication



The Blarney Stone is a historical stone, or actually part of the Blarney Castle in Ireland where it was believed that kissing the stone can grant you the gift of gab. Yeah, it seems strange in this day and age, but who are we to question tradition? It's not like I'm saying that Santa Claus doesn't exist (OOPS!).



There is so much to know about conversation that anyone, even I, could ever realize. You can go though watching talk shows; radio programs; clubs dedicated to public speaking; ordinary conversations; certain rules still apply when it comes to interaction through words. It may sound tedious, I know, but even though it's your mouth that's doing the work, your brain works twice as hard to churn out a lot of things you know. So what better way to start learning to be an effective communication is to know the very person closest to you: yourself.



1. What you know.

Education is all about learning the basics, but to be an effective speaker is to practice what you've learned. My stint as guest at every Toastmasters' meeting I go to taught me that we all have our limitations, but that doesn't mean we can't learn to keep up and share what we know.



2. Listening.

It's just as important as asking questions. Sometimes listening to the sound of our own voice can teach us to be a little bit confident with ourselves and to say the things we believe in with conviction.



3. Humility

We all make mistakes, and sometimes we tend to slur our words, stutter, and probably mispronounce certain words even though we know what it means, but rarely use it only to impress listeners. So in a group, don't be afraid to ask if you're saying the right word properly and if they're unsure about it then make a joke out of it. I promise you it'll make everyone laugh and you can get away with it as well.



4. Eye Contact

There's a lot to say when it comes to directing your attention to your audience with an eye-catching gaze. It's important that you keep your focus when talking to a large group in a meeting or a gathering, even though he or she may be gorgeous.



5. Kidding around

A little bit of humor can do wonders to lift the tension, or worse boredom when making your speech. That way, you'll get the attention of the majority of the crowd and they'll feel that you're just as approachable, and as human to those who listen.



6. Be like the rest of them

Interaction is all about mingling with other people. You'll get a lot of ideas, as well as knowing what people make them as they are.



7. Me, Myself, and I

Admit it, there are times you sing to yourself in the shower. I know I do! Listening to the sound of your own voice while you practice your speech in front of a mirror can help correct the stress areas of your pitch. And while you're at it you can spruce up as well.



8. With a smile

A smile says it all much like eye contact. There's no point on grimacing or frowning in a meeting or a gathering, unless it's a wake. You can better express what you're saying when you smile.



9. A Role Model

There must be at least one or two people in your life you have listened to when they're at a public gathering or maybe at church. Sure they read their lines, but taking a mental note of how they emphasize what they say can help you once you take center stage.



10. Preparation

Make the best out of preparation rather than just scribbling notes and often in a hurried panic. Some people like to write things down on index cards, while other resort to being a little more silly as they look at their notes written on the palm of their hand (not for clammy hands, please). Just be comfortable with what you know since you enjoy your work.



And that about wraps it up. These suggestions are rather amateurish in edgewise, but I've learned to empower myself when it comes to public or private speaking and it never hurts to be with people to listen how they make conversations and meetings far more enjoyable as well as educational.

Impossible is Just a Word

Everyone, at some point of his or her life, has dreamed of being somebody special, somebody big. Who hasn't fantasized about being the one who hits the game-winning homer? Who hasn't dreamed of being the homecoming queen? And how many times have we dreamed of being rich, or successful, or happy with our relationships?



Often, we dream big dreams and have great aspirations. Unfortunately, our dreams remain just that ñ dreams. And our aspirations easily collect dust in our attic.



This is a sad turn of events in our life. Instead of experiencing exciting adventures in self actualization, we get caught up in the humdrum of living from day-to-day just barely existing.



But you know what? Life could be so much better, if only we learned to aim higher.



The most common problem to setting goals is the word impossible. Most people get hung up thinking I can't do this. It's too hard. It's too impossible. No one can do this.



However, if everyone thought that, there would be no inventions, no innovations, and no breakthroughs in human accomplishment.



Remember that scientists were baffled when they took a look at the humble bumblebee. Theoretically, they said, it was impossible for the bumblebee to fly. Unfortunately for the bumble, bee no one has told it so. So fly it does.



On the other hand, some people suffer from dreaming totally outrageous dreams and not acting on them. The result? Broken dreams, and tattered aspirations.



If you limit yourself with self-doubt, and self-limiting assumptions, you will never be able to break past what you deem impossible. If you reach too far out into the sky without working towards your goal, you will find yourself clinging on to the impossible dream.



Try this exercise. Take a piece of paper and write down some goals in your life. Under one header, list down things ëyou know you can doí. Under another header, write the things ëyou might be able to do.í And under one more, list the things that that are ëimpossible for you to do.í



Now look at all the headers strive every day to accomplish the goals that are under things ëyou know you can doí. Check them when you are able to accomplish them. As you slowly are able to check all of your goals under that heading, try accomplishing the goals under the other header-the one that reads ëyou might be able to do.í



As of the items you wrote under things I could do are accomplished, you can move the goals that are under things that are ëimpossible for you to doí to the list of things ëyou might be able to do.í



As you iterate through this process, you will find out that the goals you thought were impossible become easier to accomplish. And the impossible begin to seem possible after all.



You see, the technique here is not to limit your imagination. It is to aim high, and start working towards that goal little by little. However, it also is unwise to set a goal that is truly unrealistic.



Those who just dream towards a goal without working hard end up disappointed and disillusioned.



On the other hand, if you told someone a hundred years ago that it was possible for man to be on the moon, they would laugh at you. If you had told them that you could send mail from here to the other side of the world in a few seconds, they would say you were out of your mind. But, through sheer desire and perseverance, these impossible dreams are now realities.



Thomas Edison once said that genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration. Nothing could be truer. For one to accomplish his or her dreams, there has to be had work and discipline. But take note that that 1% has to be a think-big dream, and not some easily accomplished one.



Ask any gym rat and he or she will tell you that there can be no gains unless you are put out of your comfort zone. Remember the saying, ìNo pain, no gainî? That is as true as it can be.



So dream on, friend! Donít get caught up with your perceived limitations. Think big and work hard to attain those dreams. As you step up the ladder of progress, you will just about find out that the impossible has just become a little bit more possible.

Energy Healing 101: Pranic, Tantric, and Reiki

You have probably come across exotic-sounding terms such as ìchakraî, ìpranaî, ìauraî, and ìtantraî in your course of reading books on spirituality, sex, and healing in the New Age literature section of the bookstore. But whatís the real scoop behind these exotic vocabularies?



Are All Energy Healings the Same?



Chakra or energy center is a term used in Pranic healing, an ancient Hindu system of energy healing. ìPranaî means life energy. ìAuraî is another terminology traced to Pranic healing. Aura is a non-physical body that consists of energy, which exists along with our physical body. The aura that covers our body is said to have seven layers pertaining to the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual aspects of an individual as manifested by energy. Studying the color and thickness of auras give ideas on the state of health of individuals. Six colors are associated with aura and interpreted into six personalities. These colors are all present in an individual but one or two are more pronounced.

Green ñ ambitious achiever

Blue ñ spiritual peacemaker

White ñ unconventional chameleon

Red ñ activist

Orange ñ creative communicator

Violet - psychic



Although Tantra is popularly associated with the peculiar practice of sex and spirituality, it is another method of energy healing. It comes from the word ìtanî which means to spread or expand. The concept of connectedness is a recurring theme in Tantric writings on sex and spirituality. As a method of healing, spirituality and sex figure prominently. It is presupposed that the union of man and woman can reach spiritual levels during orgasm, which removes the body and mind off collected impurities. These impurities being negative energies can in turn manifest as physical illnesses.



Unlike Pranic and Tantric healings, which have Hindu origins, Reiki originated from Japan. It is relatively younger than Pranic and Tantric healings having been rediscovered in the early 1900ís. Reiki stands for universal energy, an energy brought forth by higher intelligence. Students of Reiki are taught how to tap this energy to heal physical, emotional, and mental illnesses.



Although Pranic, Tantra, and Reiki are all systems of energy healing, they differ in the type of energy tapped for healing: life energy, sexual energy, and universal energy respectively.



The concepts of the connectedness of mind, body, and spirit; the connection of individuals to all living and nonliving things around them and to the universe; and how energy impacts physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being are some of the salient similarities of these three healing methods.



Why Do People Turn to Energy Healing?



Pranic, Tantric, and Reiki are considered alternative methods of healing. In spite of the availability and relative accessibility of modern medicine, how come more and more people are being drawned to them? Here are some possible reasons:



∑ Energy healing worked where modern medicine failed.



For several reasons both explainable and unexplainable, modern medical treatment failed to heal ailments and conditions in several if not many persons. Research or data may not be able to support this statement. But for the families of the dying as well as for the dying patient, they would take the risk of using alternative methods ranging from herbals and organics, faith healers, witch doctors, and New Age healing techniques just to be get well.



∑ People perceive modern medicine to be isolating.



Medical treatments are oftentimes focused on the disease and its causative agent, which can make a patient feel isolated and treated like a mere host of the disease. Although recent developments in hospital practice are gradually promoting the holistic treatment of a patient, the perception still persists. Unlike in energy healing, since energy and spirituality are intimately linked, the patient feels that all aspects of his health are being attended to.





∑ Energy healing is non-obtrusive and natural thus it is safer.



Repeated surgical procedures are physically and emotionally traumatic for most patients. It is but a logical and attractive option to both patient and families to look for less stressful health interventions. Moreover, with the rising popularity of New Age religions, going natural is the way to go.





∑ Energy healing is a good way of relieving stress.



Meditation is part and parcel of energy healing methods and this is an added come-on for highly stressed people. Moreover, sophisticated equipment is not required thus it becomes all the more convenient for students and future students of energy healing.



The battle between alternative healing and mainstream medicine continues as both present the benefits of their approach. But in the final analysis, what matters is the restoration of good health.

Enjoy Your Life: Change Your Point of View

"Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud, and one sees the stars."- Frederick Langbridge, A Cluster of Quiet Thoughts



If youíve placed second in a writing contest, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again?



In life, you are always filled with choices. You may opt to have a pessimistís view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take the optimistís route and take a challenging and fulfilling life.



So why nurture an optimistís point of view? And why now?



Well, optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma.



On the other hand, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewifeís disorder but also a teen-agerís disorderí as well.



Hereís how optimists are in action and researches that back up why it really pays to be an optimist:



Optimists expect the best



The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad events, which will last a long time and undermine everything they do, are their own fault.



The truth is optimists are confronted with the same hard knocks of this world. What differs is the way they explain their misfortune---itís the opposite way. They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case.



Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. They use 'positive reinterpretation.' In other words, they most likely reinterpret a negative experience in a way that helps them learn and grow. Such people are unfazed by bad situation, they perceive it is a challenge and try harder.



They wonít say ìthings will never get better,î ìIf I failed once, it will happen againî and ìIf I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.î



Positive expectancies of optimists also predict better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles.



People respond positively to optimists



Optimists are proactive and less dependent on others for their happiness. They find no need to control or manipulate people. They usually draw people towards them. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with.



Optimism seems a socially desirable trait in all communities. Those who share optimism are generally accepted while those who spread gloom, panic and hysteria are treated unfavorably.



In life, these people often win elections; get voted most congenial and sought for advice.



When the going gets tough, optimists get tougher



Optimists typically maintain higher levels of subjective well-being during times of stress than do people who are less optimistic. In contrast, pessimists are likely to react to stressful events by denying that they exist or by avoiding dealing with problems. Pessimists are more likely to quit trying when difficulties arise.



They persevere. They just donít give up easily, they are also known for their patience. Inching their way a step closer to that goal or elusive dream.



Optimists are healthier and live longer



Medical research has justified that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body's ability to fight disease.



Optimistsí health is unusually good. They age well, much freer than most people from the usual physical ills of middle age. And they get to outlive those prone to negative thoughts.



So why not be an optimist today? And think positively towards a more fulfilled life.



Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors? Why not be resilient? Like everybody else you are bound to hit lows sometimes but donít just stay there. Carry yourself out of the mud and improve your chances of getting back on the right track. And why not inspire others to remove their dark-colored glasses and see life in the bright side?